Notes To Myself : March 2017

My name is Scott Meckley. I was born December 24, 1975 at Audrain Medical Center in Mexico Missouri. I went to Hawthorne Elementary School where I was put in special education classes. I was slower at learner things than other people, but the thing was when I learned it, I learned it unless it was something I haven't done in a while. When I was 2-3 years old I have cleft pallet surgery, and the doctors didn't shoot enough oxygen into my brain. I struggle with sometimes remembering something you may have said to me a few minutes ago.

I think it was 1985-1986 me and my family we moved to Centralia Missouri. I went to Chester Borne Middle School in Centralia Missouri. In the eighth grade I played center for the Centralia Panthers. I was third string center. I went 0-1 for the season. I did the best schooling in Centralia Missouri, making the B honor roll. I didn't perform decently in school in Mexico Missouri, and while I tried the best I could, I just wasn't happy in Mexico Missouri.

In 1990 me and my family moved back to Mexico Missouri. I couldn't stand the moving every four years. So I tried to make the best of things in Mexico High School. I did okay in school, but never really great. I struggled with concentration do to depression and anxiety. I did try to make the best of high school though. I went to my junior prom with a wonderful and awesome lady, which was to me the best moment in high school besides FCA, when I did a Christian Rap song, and I wrote the lyrics not just for myself, but for three of my classmates. Our rap names were Scooty-D which was me, but now it is a.k.a. FOCUS, Stu-Dogg, MC Parks, and B-Lind. Getting a standing ovation from the people at FCA was one of the greatest moments of my life and the second best moment in high school. In 1995 I graduated from Mexico High School and went from 1995-1996 to Central Christian College Of The Bible in Moberly Missouri.

In 1994 I went to a chiropractor in my hometown of Mexico Missouri. Doctors could never understand what was wrong with me, and why I had and still struggle with physical coordination at times. My chiropractor was Dr. Robert Peak who is now retired. He said that I was diagnosed with spina bifida. Spina bifida is a birth defect where this is an incomplete closing of the backbone and membranes around the spinal cord. I think sometimes not knowing drove me more nuts than knowing. I was mocked and laughed at in gym class because I didn't physically function as well as the others in class did. I'm over it now, but at the time it hurt.

In 1993 I worked my first job as a grocery clerk at Hickman's IGA in Mexico Missouri. It was a good job for someone in high school. I worked there until July 1998. In July 1998 until July 2002, I worked for a company called Home Decorator's Collection. I was an order picker. I would go out into the racks and get on a cherry picker and pull items from a rack. I admit I was scared to death of heights, but found ways to deal with them. I would try not to take the picker to the very very top of the fifth level, because when the picker would stop at the top, it would rock back and forth.

In November of 2002 I started working for Wal-Mart in Mexico Missouri until November of 2006. It was around 2005 where I said I can't stand the way I'm getting treated at jobs. So I started looking for ways to work from home, because I couldn't stand working paycheck to paycheck when I was building someone else's dreams. Why should I have to be grateful to have a job, when I'm not the one reaping the benefits like the CEO'S at the top.

In November of 2006 until June of 2007, I started working for a company called Brookstone. I worked in returns and I struggled with it. I was laid off in June of 2007.

In July of 2007 I started working for a company called Lewis Bakeries. I stocked shelves, unloaded trucks, and counted bakery goods. Once a week I had to take inventory of how many I threw away, and how many were left on the shelf. Three times a week, I had to throw away expired bread.

In 2012 I quit Lewis Bakeries because I was thinking about going truck driving. I decided against truck driving because I found out that Truck Driving School was going to cost $3,500 unless I stayed for a year. I didn't know if I was going to like it to give it a year. I admit just that price alone freaked me out. In 2012 I decided to take a vacation with my best friend to Orlando Florida. Going to Orlando Florida on vacation was the best move ever. After a few months though of being on vacation, I had to go back to Mexico Missouri after running out of money.

After spending years of trying to make it in Mexico Missouri, I couldn't stand it no more. My anxiety kept getting worse, I was on many medications, only to find myself either staying the same or feeling worse. I started realizing it was my environment was part of the problem. I seen the same things over and over, I saw little to no opportunities at all. I didn't have a lot of friends. I started in 2012 filing for disability because I just didn't feel like I was in 1993 and earlier years of my life when i was working.

I always felt like something was wrong with me but couldn't never figure it out. I spend years not understanding why I felt so different until in July of 2013. In July of 2013 I went to a psychologist, and was given a bunch of tests ( yeah like that didn't make me even more anxious), but it helped some being able to start to strangers about what I was going through. So after the test, I found out I was diagnosed with autistic spectrum disorder. I didn't have a clue what it was, so I started reading up on it. The name of the book slips my mind at the moment, but after I read this book, it helped me understand myself. I had a little bit more confidence after reading it. It helped me feel better about myself. I will confess I don't have confidence 100 percent of the time, but I have more than I use to, and that is a plus.

March of 2014 I went to a disability hearing, I admit I was so nervous, because I was afraid I was going to get pounded with a ton of questions, and sometimes the way people word questions, I mean to answer it one way and it comes out another way. I'm thankful that the questions were my name, birthdate and address I believe was what i was asked. My therapists did so good that it lead to the judge only asking though things. I admit I was worried whether I was going to get my disability or not. A few weeks later I got a letter and it said I was approved. I was overflowed with joy, because I knew I was going to finally get to leave a place where so many people were hateful towards me.

In April of 2014 I accomplished one of my biggest goals ever, to be able to move to either to California or Florida. I choose to move to Orlando Florida because my best friend was living there. I have experienced some tough moments here in Orlando Florida, but am grateful to be living in a city where many people treat me good.

December of 2014, I decided to try again working part time. My best friend happened to be the boss at this company that he was telling me about. He was telling me that I would be typing medical records. With the experience I had with blogging, I figured why not. I figured out the job within 2 weeks, which is new for me, because while so many figure out something in that long of period, it took me usually six months to figure it out, but when I figured it out, I then knew what I was doing. I couldn't work with most bosses, because most bosses don't work with you , at least that is what I experienced. The thing about typing medical records is working in the warehouse, I don't have to be around a lot of people at one time too much. I enjoy the company of people especially great people, but I do get social exhausted. I wish I were only physically exhausted from coming home from a job, but when you are physically, emotionally, socially and even at times spiritually exhausted, it can cause major troubles with your health. I'm not the biggest fan of working for someone else, but if I'm going to, I'd rather my boss be someone I respect and respects me. I'm thankful for that.

I want to mention some other things you should know about me, I love to watch game shows. Deal Or No Deal was my guilty pleasure because I knew how to play the game, and I admit the models are beautiful. I always had a strategy that unless my board was great, if I got passed $100,000 I was saying Deal. Growing up I also loved watching Card Sharks with Jim Perry. If Card Sharks was ever brought back, I would love to either have the opportunity to host it, or become a contestant on it.

I also love writing my own rap especially positive uplifting truthful curse free raps. I believe you can have fun in music without all of the cussing and still enjoy yourself. One of the reasons I want to do this site is to have enough money to write life changing music. I think people could relate to some of the things I write about because I've experienced feelings of suicide, anxiety, depression, frustration, fears, anger, joy, pain. I need the money to have a place to practice, and I want to produce my own album or have a friend that I trust myself to produce it or be my agent. . I would be too exhausted to perform every single night even though I would appreciate all of my fans. Don't get me wrong, I do want to make some money while making music, but money isn't my motivation for making music, it is about having fun rapping on the mike and trying to change other people's lives with positive uplifting encourage music. To me their is so many styles of rap out there that it is hard for me to pick one. Their is crunk, trap, hip hop, gangsta, jazz, hardcore, bass, rock rap like some of P.O.D's songs. Music can be a blessing or be a curse to someone's life, I want the music I write to be a blessing to someone's life.

I love to watch the NBA. I am the weirdest NBA fan ever because I love more than one team. My top favorite teams are the Orlando Magic and the Philadelphia 76ers. I had the opportunity twice to meet Orlando Magic center Nikola Vucevic, who seemed like a really great guy. Meeting Vucevic was one of the most interesting experiences of my life, because when I was in junior high I was the second tallest person in my class, so everyone looked up to me because so many were shorter, it was refreshing to be able to look up at someone taller than me. One of my dreams while living in Orlando is to be able to meet the rest of the Orlando Magic team, the players the coach, and even have them teach me the plays, because I forgot and haven't played since 8th grade. I run like a center but can pass like a guard, and block like a center, but have the shooting skills of a guard. I am a lot better in half-court than full court because I don't run extremely fast. I don't just want to meet the rest of the Orlando Magic, I also would love to take a trip to Philadelphia and watch a Sixers game. I do route for Joel Embiid to heal, and to see Embiid, Simmons and whoever they draft next year on the court. My dream would be to see the Sixers VS Magic in the conference Finals.

Notes To Myself

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Home Page On My Website

About Me Page On My Website

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Notes to liberals